Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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