3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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