After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
