Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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