i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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