I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
