i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You were trust falling into bushes
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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