She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
sarcasm needs its own font
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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