Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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