her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Come on in and take your pants off
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