I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
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