So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You need a sexual gate keeper
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
