its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
