no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
