I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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