Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
