Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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