woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize