She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize