We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
