She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
