i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize