their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize