Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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