I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize