Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
