o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
