rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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