It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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