I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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