bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize