see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize