She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
