i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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