no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
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I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
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Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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