I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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