id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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