we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
