I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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