I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He's on the porch naked. Help.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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