why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
