That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
the liver wants what the liver wants
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize