Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
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They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
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There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?