so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
