I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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