this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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