i was born a porn star she said
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
