yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I will pee on everything he values.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
