just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize