"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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