He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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