I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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